During pregnancy I had promised my baby that I will protect her always. I will be there for her whenever she needs me. She doesn’t have to keep staring and asking for my attention. I swore to her again when I received her first in my arms. Those little hands will be held forever. That tiny face will always be kissed and caressed. I vowed to understand her expressions & reactions. When she will start to speak I will not only listen but also understand her innocent language.
I wanted to always cuddle her throughout the day, before sleeping, after getting up, while playing and probably just be with her 24*7.
Now she is so used to me that never allows me to go anywhere. Though I am to be blamed as this is what habit I inculcated!! Wherever I have been either for shopping, restaurants, movies, most of the places she has been my company. Since leaving with hubby on certain weekends and getting pampered at the salon is not possible each time, I have even taken her to the salon on certain occasions.
Yes she is a clingy baby. Wants mumma all the time!
Should I be happy or fuss over it, may be the feeling is 50:50.
I always had this notion that she is my child and I have to take care of her but I fear this attitude might make her dependent on me.
I want her to be independent. I want her to sometimes play with me and many a times play her own imaginative games in the childish world. If she is with her friends I want her to just forget about me and focus on playing with them. It’s an ultimate paradox as though I want to be with her but I still want to just take a step behind and let her be by herself.
Well not all babies who are glued to you are cranky, frightened or less confident. They just feel complete when their mothers are with them. I am sure many mothers will relate to the signs of a clingy baby:
1. Your baby wants you to carry when in public
2. Will hide behind your back when you meet someone(this might not happen with all)
3. When you are in the kitchen will come and hug you and with innocent eyes gives signs to carry
4. Will lean on to you for half an hour after waking up
5. Is hysterical, holds your dress and move around in the house. Will follow you all over the house even if means accompanying you in the washroom
6. Will bang the door when you are taking bath and advise you to come out or warn to open the door
7. Will not allow you to talk or chat on the phone or even with other family members
8. Will hug you and cuddle a lot before sleeping
9. Hold your hands while sleeping. Even at middle of the night will search for you in the pretext of assuming mumma might have gone out with daddy for a date late at night:P
10. If daddy is taking them out will check first whether mumma won’t disappear behind their back. So if you want to escape with your girlfriends, change into party clothes when they are out with daddy. If they understand the truth… say it .
11. They don’t want daddy to play, feed or even make them sleep. Though daddies will feel rejected, but it’s just a phase and will pass.
12. They don’t want to outgrow your arms as they feel secured for their needs
I love this kind of attention as this definitely makes the daddy jealous:)
How long will this continue? It’s nothing but separation anxiety which most of the kids go through.
Well, i believe till the child reaches age 5-6. Soon they will turn out to be teenagers and will become more attached to their friends & busy in building their careers. They will stop being coochi coo with us and we will crib as to why they grew up so soon.
Rather than freaking out lets presume it’s all due to changes in their development phase and neural milestones. The more we try to step out, the more they get possessive. We need to give them time to understand that it’s ok if they are without mumma few hours and they need not worry as they are in the comfort of their loved ones.
Toddlers want only love and attention. The more we love them and show affection the more kind and emphatic they will become towards others. They will generate a mindset of a humble human being who knows that love can even change a person. Its demanding & challenging but be assured they will grow up to be very adjusting, happy and confident individuals.
Though I want my daughter to be independent and confidently do things without me. But i will still love to hug and kiss her when she grows up!!
If any of you can relate to this, please comment & share your views.
You can also read my the article on below link